Monday, February 7, 2011

A New Chapter Begins

Today marks the beginning of a new chapter in our lives.  One that I was not ready for.... one that I knew loud and clear the Lord was telling me to begin, but I fought it and fought it ....... I wasn't ready.  I prayed and prayed that maybe I was hearing wrong... surely this can't be the right timing...... it just can't.   The answer I kept hearing??  "My ways are not your ways.... my plans are not your plans...... for everything there is a season"   But surely Lord, this timing is completely wrong!!  He reassured me..... it wasn't. 

My Hannah returned to our wonderful Christian school today.  Just in time for the first day of the second half of the year.  "But Lord!!! I cried... this is the same exact time you told us to put Punkin back in school last year!! What is this? Are we forever going to be known as the 'start school in the middle of the year family'?" ????   

"For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways," declares the LORD. 

Last Wednesday, Hannah (Banana) and I spent the day together back at the school she has attended from Pre-K 3 through third grade.   Every morning, the entire grammar school meets together for Memory Period.  A time when they work on memorizing, this particular morning they were working on a passage of scripture. The teacher stopped after this lengthy paragraph to explain exactly what these scriptures meant.   Every word that came out of her mouth went straight to my heart.   It was as if she was speaking directly to me.... these verses were about faith - faith in knowing when God tells you to do something, that he will DO IT.   Faith to let Him lead you... having faith enough to follow... knowing He will always guide you.... knowing He can move mountains...   With tears rolling down my face.. I knew. I just knew that HE IS faithful.  That Hannah couldn't be in a better place.   Even when I can't see how on earth this will work... I know....

 He. Is. Faithful.

I will always, always cherish the days I was allowed to homeschool our girls.  I knew that when God prompted our hearts to begin homeschooling, that it would only be for a season.  I loved every minute of it. (Well, okay, ALMOST every minute of it).  Boo and I will still have plenty of homeschooling time together in the months ahead... and then she will follow along with her sisters next fall when she starts kindergarten. She is already counting the days.  Boo joined Hannah for a few minutes at lunch today - she is going to miss her terribly.  It was so nice to see Hannah's very warm welcome before school this morning.. so many of her former teachers to give her encouraging hugs.. and old friends so welcoming and excited to see her again.

I will always be an advocate for homeschooling.  The benefits are enormous.  Maybe I will homeschool again one day.. who knows?   But I do know without a shadow of a doubt.. that we are following the path He has laid before us.   I know that the school God has placed us in is simply a treasure.... such Godly and loving teachers.... such biblical knowledge taught.... such opportunities.   I am simply in awe of how hard our school is working and doing everything possible to help Hannah succeed.  She has a renewed confidence in herself and her abilities, and everything possible is being done at school to ensure that it continues.   

Several people have told me recently that as they have prayed for me, they have had a vision of me standing and holding a sword in my hand.   Some of this has related to other circumstances going on in my life, but I now know that this is also very closely related to this decision that we have had to wrestle over.   My sweet Hannah needed some time learning at home after having some special struggles while learning at school.  Her mom needed to pick up her sword for her and fight for her and help her as much as a Mom can help. We are discovering some coping mechanisms to help her learn better... other warriors have come alongside and shown us how important it is for her to "jump back in" and figure out some other methods, to find her way..... It's easy to fall into a "safe zone" in a homeschool environment, and harder to push through some learning difficulties.   It's time for me to hand over Hannah's sword to other incredible servant-leaders who know exactly how to help her... in ways that I can't.  They will help Hannah carry her sword, until she is ready to carry it herself.

"Thank you Lord, for showing us how to lead Hannah, and the paths you have set before her.  We know you have created her in your image, so intricately and wonderfully made.  We pray that You continue to guide her every step, and we pray for the people you have put into her life to help form her into the person you want her to become.  Thank you for the gift of our school, and we pray that it continues to raise servant leaders that glorify you in everything they do.  Help us to remember to deny ourselves, pick up the cross, and follow You. "

The opportunity to homeschool has completely changed my views on parenting.  I am blessed that most of what I have learned will easily continue into our new lifestyle of having school at school and at home. 

Education commences at the mother's knee, and every word spoken within hearsay of little children tends toward the formation of character.  -Hosea Ballou
The job at hand is enormous, but we must seek God as our guide through every mountain top and every valley as we raise our children.



Christy said...

I am so glad you posted your thoughts on this. We are struggling with a similiar decision next year for what will be 1st grade and it is so hard. You really helped me see with more clarity (and I think I need to stop reading as many homeschool blogs that make me feel incompetent!) ;) Ha - thank you so much. And I will pray for a great transition for you both!

The Full Nelson said...

It sounds like you have a wonderful school for the girls to attend. I wish there was something like that where I live. I am sure I would feel so much more at ease for my son starting kindergarten in the fall.


Tissues, I need tissues! Oh He is so so faithful! Praise Him!

Joanne said...

What a lovely testimony. Isn't it just the best feeling in the world to know that HE is with us Every step of the way! Beautiful Beautiful post. Blessings, Joanne

Karen said...

B.E.A.Uuuutiful! :)

Susie said...

The school sounds lovely, i hope Hannah has a wonderful time there - i'm sure she will, she looks very happy with all her friends x

Yoki said...

Oh Heather, Tears , Tears , Tears !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I will attempt to respond at a drier time. May The Lord Bless and
Keep your Family in HIS All knowing care.

Our Precious little one had such an unkind experience in K5;
through much prayer and tears,
we were led to homeschool this school year for First grade. I pray that one
day, one year the Lord will restore her strength, ( emotions ) and the thoughts that school/teachers
can be a kind and amazing experience. She is such a gentle
and sensitive little girl who
loves the Lord.I pray the Lord
will one day direct us to such
a school of character and promise !! You are Blessed !!